Depression? ...Too light of a word.

[spiral]

WARNING!

THIS THREAD CONTAINS DEPRESSION AND TALKS OF LOSING LIFE. IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE DEPRESSED, DO NOT READ THIS DAMN THREAD. OTHERWISE, IF YOU CARE TO READ IT OR OTHERWISE ARE WORRIED, DO NOT READ IT. IF YOU REALLY, REALLY WANT TO KNOW WHY TAKE'S BEEN GONE, DO NOT FUCKING READ IT. ONLY READ THIS, IF YOU CAN DEAL WITH DEPRESSION AND YOU'RE READING OUT OF CARE, NOT CURIOSITY. WITH THAT BEING SAID, PLEASE READ BELOW.

So, let me put it in the best way I can. I have been off the sight lately due to emotional stress, and let me cut to the chase. My friends ditched me, my parents don't give a shit, and this is the only place I can call -home-. A few days if not weeks ago, I attempted the worst of things. Depression got to me, anti-depressants didn't help, and I tried to kill myself. I went into my guest room, purposely drove a nail into the roof, took a rope, and attempted to hang myself. My father ran in and stopped me by throwing me off the chair and taking the rope down, but otherwise it happened. I...I'm about to cry.

And then, the light finally came to me. I finally found out two things that helped me. First off, God. Please, if you're an athiest...shut up, I don't need to hear it. Secondly, this place. I used to come here religiously, so now I must finally say it. This is the only place that makes me happy, it's the only happiness left in my life. Takeru is coming back, not necessarily AS Takeru, but he's coming back. David, myself, is coming back as well but the character's are gone. It's cheesy, but I want my happiness back. This place gave me happiness, gave me friends...it gave me a purpose. A purpose in life. I know it's just a forum, I'm stupid I know...

I love you all so much, brothers and sisters I never had...but I had them here. God damn it all I had them here. I won't be going to suicide again...but I must let you know right here and right now. I am back, for good. There may be a bit of hiatus here and there so my depression can rule itself out, but other than that...hell, sometimes the thought of giving this place up for good, I grow a common fear. I guess you could say I have 'quitLCaphobia' the fear of quitting La Campana. Thank you for those who are reading, comments are greatly appreciated. I love you all, am back, and hope I can rock as hard as I did when I was here.

To those who don't know me, I'll grow to know you. For those, not trying to pick names but those like Leslie, Ash', Yuyu, and anyone else not mentioned who have been there alongside me, this is my huge 'THANK YOU' to you. For those who hate me...whether you hate me or like me, you're still talking about me, words from the great Dale Earnhardt Sr. For everyone else, and for those about to rock in the world of roleplay...well, David and Takeru as well as myself...we salute you.